i just came across a whole box of letters that i have kept throughout the years.
i have never felt so loved before!
after reading all the letters
i realised that i am very very fortunate to have such friends
and also family!
im glad that i found this box
when im soo down
its really picked me up
to know that so many people actually cared about me

this is to the people in my life
who have made it soo fabulous
( no names mentioned ) :

my life is fabulous because of people like you
thanks
i really thank god for you
even though people dont like me
and often make my life miserable,
people like you were always there for me
double thanks
you complete my life
you help me when you can
things are better because of you
triple thanks
i always hoped that fairytales would happen
but they were right before my eyes!
you take my nonsense
and listen to me rant
many many thanks!

love you guys!

HELLO(:
clare is currently too lazy to blog.
so yeah, she made the nice girl who has LOADS of work to do
to help her blog.
how evil of her.
and she took my friendster pic and tried to blackmail me))):
and i have no idea if she lied to me bout giving my number away))):
i bet its lie. cos she always lie to me.
anyway, i'm supposed to talk about her wonderful, fabulous life.
which i know nothing of,
cos she never tells me anything.
so there really isnt much for me to say.
just that she is ALWAYS free.
but too LAZY to blog.
i'm jealous of such free ppl mann.

ohoh, i'm supposed to go study already!
so byebye!(:
loves;
marion(:

Superman (It's Not Easy)
I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naive
I'm just out to find
The better part of me

I'm more than a bird:I'm more than a plane
More than some pretty face beside a train
It's not easy to be me

Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
About a home I'll never see

It may sound absurd:but don't be naive
Even Heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed:but won't you conceed
Even Heroes have the right to dream
It's not easy to be me

Up, up and away:away from me
It's all right:You can all sleep sound tonight
I'm not crazy:or anything:

I can't stand to fly
I'm not that naive
Men weren't meant to ride
With clouds between their knees

I'm only a man in a silly red sheet
Digging for kryptonite on this one way street
Only a man in a funny red sheet
Looking for special things inside of me

It's not easy to be me.

i have seriously not been posting
haha
im seriously sorry
just been too busy with life
and fighting the sickness
that allows you to skip school
and that makes you think weird
*flu*

its been a really bad time for me
during chinese new
my cousins from my mum's side
treat me like dirt
and my cousins from my dad's side
im so glad they love me
even though we dont see each other much
it great to talk to them
everytime we meet
thanks <3s!

i like that song
superman
by five for fighting
its nice!
even though the main singer sounds gay
haha
at least i have something to do
when my cousins treat me like dirt

You've been my sister for many years,
We've laughed together
And shed some tears.
We've had harsh words,
And pulled some hair
But against the world
We are a terrific pair.
Our times together are very few,
I just want to say
I LOVE YOU!

haha
marion i found this online
gosh
it really talks about the whole time i knew you
all the laughter
all the times i hated you
all the times i felt like flicking your fat
and the time crying
because i thought you had found a better friend
but in the end,
haha
I STILL LOVE YOU!

today late for school
so that meant detention class
sheesh
anyway the whole day was bad
and i lost my e maths textbook!
like wa lao
if i tell mummy sure die lo
haii so i shall use my money
and go buy a new one.

anyway DC was okay
i did my homework
and did a little reflection
on my life

after listening to the what jessy said yesterday
i feel that i have not been living my life properly
but everytime i try to change
i fail
then i would be too lazy to pick myself up again
sometimes i wonder
why am i doing this when i dont gain anything out of this
and i never get an answer
i try to be a good friend
and a good christian example
so from now on i must
jia you!


and see people
i do post!
haha just that i dont do it so often now
cause im busy!
byebye

suddenly felt very tired today
couldnt wake up
maybe cause i didnt feel like walking
anyway reached church late
and marvin was already waiting for gen and i
haha im always the middle person to arrive
and gen is almost always the latest!
anyway did the powerpoint
and then the stupid notebook died on us
what crap!

anyway then went for yf
as usual!
then realised that i was to do games today
so i panicked
yeah shit i panicked
then i decided to collect ideas
for ycom's next big project
haha sorry people its secret!
anyway some were stupid
and we didnt care about them

anyway we roughly got ideas
thanks for those who gave good ideas!

then on the way to j8
the most hilarious thing happened
guess what!
pearl's shoes broke!
wakakaka
then we walked the whole of j8 to find her slippers
grrrrr
hungry hungry
we finally found it
thank god haha
ate KFC and i suddenly thought of hanmae
so marion and i talked about her
awwww miss her!

anyway very tired
so going to sleep
night!!

argh its almost time for me to go tuition and im super sianed out.
last few days at school didnt work out as usual
and i sorta got into trouble
with forgetting to bring stuff and sleeping in class
oh ya and i got into trouble with my a maths teacher
i told him i didnt understand a maths question
and he scolded me saying
that im in express
and i should know
that i must be faking it
and dunno wat other rubbish!
he was sooooooo irritating
and so in the end he made me cry
( i cant believe i cried )
and ran out of the classroom
sheesh!
is it wrong for me to ask questions?
he is paid to teach us and help us in our maths!
cant believe it.

and at gb i got my 2nd year badge!
woohoo!
and i also got a BLACKEYE!
cause this sec 1 girl was going to pass me the ball
while playing captain's ball
then she unexpectedly shuffed the ball in my face!
so i was like " pass me the ball "
and the next thing i knew
WHAM!! i was hit in the face
now blackeye
cant really see the bruise
but i know its there
when i move my eye it hurts
haha
what a "wonderful" week

okay i just broke one of my rules about not being emo.
today at school i was very stressed even though
it was the only day i did do my homework.
the teachers are being very ridiculous with their punishments.
like who says if you dont do your duty or
didnt bring your homework you copy 10 pages of the textbook?
thats ridiculous
and who calls your parents up immediately
when you dont submit your hw?
like come on
its not like i dont have a good reason
how do you expect me to submit my hw
when i dont even understand it?!
ridiculous

gosh and when i came home
i was already having a headache
and my mother asked me to cut some cabbages
and after i finished
she just kept asking me to do this and that
and its not like i have been back from school
like for the whole day
and have not been doing anything
the thing is that i just came home from school
and i have been cutting her cabbages
and now she is pressuring me
like what was my brother doing at that time?
he was playing his Ps2
like sheesh!
biasness at school and home too!

ive been having a headache since morning
and i need to sleep now
byebye!

last night i really felt bad.
im not sure why but i was worried that my week at school wouldnt work out for me
or i will get into trouble or something bad will happen to me.
maybe im over-reacting but i keep feeling down for no reason.
and im always tired.
and the best thing is,
i just forgot my goal in life.
so i shall type it out on my blog so
that when i forget i can take a look at it.

goals for the week:
1] be less vulgar
2] be not so emo
3] stop worrying
4] spend time talking to god
5] do my homework
6] be a nice girl and not irritate my friends
7] just STOP WORRYING

okay today at school it just didnt work out for me.
kept feeling sleepy
and constantly finding myself day-dreaming
and wishing to go home
didnt feel hungry at all
and kept getting pissed off with
the stupid attention seeker in my class.
all bad bad things
so i must try to improve
today i was not sooo vulgar
so on the way to achieving goal no. 1!

tmrw is a new day and now im going to sleep then do my homework.
so that i will reach goal no. 5!
byebye

got to church late as usual
had the wine and bread thing
and i didnt spill the drink
or crush the bread!
hurray to me!

bs was good
cause i did my homework
when we had sharing with jessy
she talked about BGR
and i shared about
my life in school
where im alyas vulgar
and i dont do my homework
and i talk back to my teachers
and i break school rules

today's bible study made me understand
that i need to change
i need to allow god in my life more often
and i need to change my life too
when jessy was sharing it
really helped me to plan for my future
about what im going to be
in the line of BGR
and that i should not
fall under peer pressure

i must persevere
and not fall to peer pressure
where in my school
i have lost a few friends
because im a christian
so i must not follow my other friends
and block god out from my life
but i must show them that god IS present in my life
so i must act in the right way

so whoever reads this
please pray for me!

school is really stressing me out. i just cannot cope with my subjects lo. like a maths is sooo confusing and i also cannot stand some people in my class. these people think that they are soo cute and keep making so much noise when people are trying to study. i think they just want attention. pity them acting like little kids when they are already upper-sec.

anyway still very stressed with school but i have not forgotten my dear friend hanmae who should be in aus now. haha hope she will cope well there and not be stressed out like me!

okay gotta go and mugmugmug! wakakaka im sooo hardworking. serious im really gonna study. byebye!